Payment / Shipping

Each dildo comes with free shipping. Orders go out within a day, and Priority Mail takes 2-3 days. Each dildo comes with a hand-sewn velvet drawstring pouch. For your privacy, the return address is listed as "H D Shipping." International orders add $5 to cover the additional postage.

There are three ways to order: by Paypal, credit card, or check. I use a PayPal shopping cart for orders on this website, and Paypal will also take payment by credit card.

Please note: There is only one of each dildo. I check the site daily and remove the ones that have been sold, but it's possible that you could buy one that's already been sold, but not yet removed. If this happens I will refund your money or suggest a substitute.

To pay by check, make payable to Hardwood Dildos and mail to PO Box 541, Halfway OR 97834. For more financial privacy, if you want to make a check to me directly, email me for my full name. Checks wait five days to clear before shipping. If you mail a check, first email me - info@hardwooddildos.com - which one you are buying so I can remove it from the site.

Guarantee: you should be completely satisfied with your Hardwood Dildo, or you may return it within 30 days for a full refund. Returned dildos will not be re-sold.
Lifetime guarantee: I take every care to seal the dildos, and I expect them to last a lifetime. Wood is an organic material that reacts somewhat to its environment, and I can't give a 100% guarantee after 10 years, or after actual use. If your dildo ever manifests a defect, you have your choice: full money back; I can refinish it (free shipping both ways); or another dildo of your choice.
Refinishing: We live in the real world, where things get scratched, or dropped, or the dog chews it. Luckily it's not the end of your dildo, send it back with $5 for postage and I'll finish it as good as new.